2009-01-03
Renhai Reflections 64: At the Bottom
At the Bottom
A Renhai by Vaughn Seward (Solo)
A snowflake falls
haphazardly to the bottom —
country road.
A tear on her cheek —
the taxi recedes into darkness.
Bright white field —
the tip of some paper
barely appears.
Click here for notes and linking details:
http://cflat7.drivehq.com/Renhai_0111.htm
[Note: this rengay is a translation from a Renhai I recently wrote in Esperanto.]
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14 comments:
Nice series, Masago..
I couldn't find the notes at the link..it only says some archive number..
But this gives ample scope for multiple readings :)
wishes,
devika
yes nice one
john
Lovely one - lots of emotion in this. Room to add our own stories too - especially in the middle one. I love the choice of 'haphazardly' in the first.
Happy New Year - I look forward to reading on with you!
Ditto Gem - "haphazardly" is a perfect combination with a winding country road. Very much enjoyed this Renhai Vaughn.
well done - this one tlks to me about the vagaries o life
Thank you all!
Devika, are you still having trouble with the notes link?
Yeah I could get to it.
Thanks Masago :)
devika
"haphazardly"- I'd hate to get that at a spelling contest! :)
Winter: the bottom line!?:)
I so enjoy the imagery portrayed in these.
HapPY NeW YeaR!
came for a new one, Masago
come again later :)
wishes,
devika
Devika, thanks for your patience... we are currently working on a three-way Renhai. :-)
Okay good to know...
Whichever way you choose Masago, poetry is what interests me..
Ofcourse your notes are helpful, though now I know to deduce the connections :)
But this Renhai poems are kind of mental excercise to me...we have discussed that earlier..anyway
wishes,
devika
That is beautiful in both Esperanto and English.
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