by Masago: Rengay #46 (Jul 13-19, 2008), Verses 1-4 (of 6)
After the storm... the ground receives a kiss / from the rose.
Our lovers' quarrel ends — the make-up smooch begins.
She presses / a tissue between her lips — lipstick remains.
Perched on a stick — he pecks at the budgie / in the mirror.
[I received some off-line feedback about the following verse that I posted last night:
Noticed after
arriving home late —
lipstick stains.
It seems that this verse tends to bring down the up-lifting feeling of the previous verse about quarreling lovers making up. I tend to agree so I have therefore replaced it with the "tissue" verse above. Hopefully you too will prefer the replacement.]
Click here for the previous rengay in the series.
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5 comments:
haiku in esperanto?
why would you do that?
master english language haiku first.
pete
Pete: You may be right... thus the absence of any Esperanto-language haiku postings here (kaj mi devas labori por plilerni Esperaton).
well, the third verse does feel lighter now... and the fourth is cute :)
John: Thanks.
Polona: :-) Thanks.
I like the replacement verse too.
I've watched parrots do that in the mirror - it's funny.
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