by Zhanna P. Rader (zh.r), and Vaughn Seward (vs);
Rengay #48 (Jul 27 - Aug 2, 2008) Verses 1-4 (of 6):
The fisherman's shirt — she breathes in its sea smell, this summer night. /zh.r
He touches her negligee — tender moments together. /vs
A nun walks by him, with downcast eyes, trembling — white lily, pink-edged. /zh.r
Roomful of people — he, without even trying, keeps noticing her. /vs
Click here for the previous rengay in the series.
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6 comments:
so many times, I've thought of writing that subject - you did it well.
What to say of a nun?! The fear of God can work miracles!?:)
As to a roomful of people, it’s a room full of people, I guess!:) Group dynamics!?:) Leading to uniform perception…
A pair of pigeons
Drink from the sidewalk puddle…
Last days of July.
nice progression
john
These have a very delicate touch to them. They really capture those magic moments when people come together. I like moving between the ones you have each written, feeling the difference between a male and female poet.
i know the feeling (don't we all?)... and it's beautifully expressed
Thank you all (on behalf of Zhanna and myself).
Borut: nice ku.
Jem: Until you mentioned it, it hadn't occurred to me that there would be a perceptible difference in who wrote each verse (in terms of the poet's gender). :-)
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