2008-09-29

Renhai Reflections 18: Three-way #2, Hanging in There

Vaughn & Zhanna

The following is the second Renhai in this three-way series. Note that the second line, "crows perch on ice-glazed branches" is the same line that Zhanna wrote for the middle verse of yesterday's "Ice-Glazed Branches" Renhai. These two Renhai therefore share a common line written by Zhanna.

Hanging in There
A Renhai by Vaughn Seward (vs), and Zhanna P. Rader (zr)
Written Dec 26 - Jan 6, 2008

Dark, musty cave —
Big Brown bats hang in their
hibernating stupor. /zr

A chilly breeze fills the air — /vs
crows perch on ice-glazed branches. /zr

Snow-covered meadow —
a deer scratches out
a patch of grass. /vs

Theme: Winter survival
Season: Winter
Link 1 to 2: Hang / Perch; Bats inside / Crows outside
Link 2 to 3: Feet
Link 3 to 1: Light, snow-filled / Dark, hollow

2008-09-28

Renhai Reflections 17: Three-way #1, Ice-Glazed Branches

Zhanna & Hortensia

[Note: In the last post I mentioned we'd be looking at the three-way Renhai. However, I mistakenly said that the "Miles Around" Renhai with Hortensia was the first renhai of the three-way. It was in fact the first renhai Hortensia and I had written together. The actual first renhai of the three-way was written by Zhanna and Hortensia.]

A three-way Renhai consists of three inter-related Renhai written by three different writers in which each pair of Renhai share a common line in their middle verses. In other words, each writer writes one middle line that is used in two of the renhai. It is as if the Renhai have a shared DNA and are true siblings even though they have different and distinct themes. Here is the first Renhai in this three-way series:

Ice-Glazed Branches
A Renhai by Hortensia Anderson (ha), and Zhanna P. Rader (zr);
Dec 13 - Jan 3, 2008

Scrape of blades —
by a line of evergreens
the snowplow stops. /ha

Crows perch on ice-glazed branches — /zr
skaters at the pond hold hands. /ha

Frozen river —
an early-bird fisherman
drills a hole. /zr

Theme: Ice
Season: Winter
Link 1 to 2: Blades
Link 2 to 3: Crows / Early bird; Pond / River
Link 3 to 1: Drilling / Plowing

The first verse has a pun in it — the most basic stop in ice skating is called the "snowplow stop".

2008-09-25

Renhai Reflections 16: Miles Around


Miles Around
A Renhai by Vaughn Seward (vs), and Hortensia Anderson (ha)
Written Nov 29 - Dec 6, 2007

Dawn's cloud cover —
the pale grey sky deepens
with the dusk. /ha

Untouched snow for miles around — /ha
faint tree line in the distance. /vs

Empty nest —
a weathered bit of string
hangs from a twig. /vs

Theme: Untouched
Season: Winter
Link 1 to 2: Sky / Horizon
Link 2 to 3: Tree / Twig
Link 3 to 1: Weathered / Pale

The untouched theme is referenced in verse 1 by the feeling of the sky being normally out of reach. "We had been fishing in the winter (the whole day - but in a boat) and at dawn, the sky was nothing but cloud cover. On our way back, as the sky darkened, I noticed we never had seen a sun. That 'dawn's pale cloud cover' was still there and grey, only deepening with dusk. It was like a rippling sky - like washable silk."

In verse 3 "untouched" is portrayed by the empty nest of the birds that had flown south for the winter.

This is another early Renhai written with Hortensia Anderson of New York city. It is the first of a three-way set of Renhai with Hortensia, myself, and Zhanna P. Rader (of Georgia). We'll look more into what a three-way is all about after posting the other two Renhai.

2008-09-21

Renhai Reflections 15: But One

Yet Another Solo Renhai

But One
A Renhai by Vaughn Seward
August 18, 2008

Picket fence —
a missing board lying
on the grass.

Roadside loosestrife,
one stalk flat down.

Birds in the hedge —
all of them bluebirds
but one, a sparrow.

Theme: One among, different
Season: Summer
Link 1 to 2: Lying flat; Herbiage.
Link 2 to 3: Blue.
Link 3 to 1: Hedge / Fence.

This solo Renhai was inspired by a clump of loostrife that grew across from our backyard most of this past summer. Loostrife is considered a weed but I love their beautiful little bluebell-like blossoms that run up each stalk:

http://tinyurl.com/4x2ra6

2008-09-17

Renhai Reflections 14: Impressed

Another Solo Renhai

Impressed
A Renhai by Vaughn Seward
August 25, 2007

Baking Tortillas —
one comes out just like
the map of Spain.

Impressed patch of underbrush,
the size of a bull moose.

A night's sleep —
she awakes with graffiti
on her cheek.

Theme: Impressions
Season: Summer/Autumn
Link 1 to 2: Flattened.
Link 2 to 3: Sleep.
Link 3 to 1: Outlined image.

This is another solo Renhai that was written at the end summer. In this case the middle verse was written at one sitting and not the line-at-a-time approach which is necessary with Renhai* written with a partner.

*As with Haiku, the plural of 'Renhai' is just 'Renhai'.

2008-09-15

Renhai Reflections 13: Sailing On

A Solo Renhai

Sailing On
A Renhai by Vaughn Seward
July 23-27, 2008

Giant sequoia —
a butterfly's wings open
then close...

Distant waves shimmer —
a tiny speck sails on.

Blue sky —
his red balloon slips
out of his hand.

Season: Summer (Butterfly; Sailing; Balloon)
Theme: Contrasted Size
Pattern: Verse 1=Land; Verse 2=Water; Verse 3=Air
Link: 1 to 2: Waving.
Link: 2 to 3: Sailing.
Link: 3 to 1: Flying.

In writing this solo Renhai I took on the role two imaginary partners and actually worked through the seven steps of writing a renhai in yesterday's post (starting with "Distant waves shimmer" as the first line of the middle verse).

2008-09-14

Renhai Reflections 12: Renhai Summary

Renhai: What & How

Before moving on to further Renhai examples, here is a summary of what Renhai is and how it is usually written:

A Minimum Definition of Renhai:

1. Three independent haiku (formatted as 3-lines, 2-lines, 3-lines).

2. Each haiku (verse) links uniquely to the other two verses in some way.

3. Each verse references at least one common theme.

4. A seasonal reference (kigo) is desired. If there is a season then only one season is referenced by at least one verse. If there is no kigo then the renhai should be nature-based and would be considered "Non-seasonal" or "All seasonal".

5. There is an appropriate title.

How the verses link, what constitutes an appropriate title, and other details such as format and style are refinements that are left up to the writers.


Seven Basic Steps to Composing a Renhai:

1. Agree on a season in which to write.
2. Write the Middle Verse, First Line (partner 1).
3. Write the Middle Verse, Second Line (partner 2).
4. Choose a Theme.
5. Write the Third Verse (partner 1).
6. Write the First Verse (partner 2).
7. Choose a Title.

Although Renhai was intended as a collaborative verse form, some members of the Renhai Studio spontaneously started writing Renhai on their own, perhaps while waiting for a partner to come free. Tomorrow I'll present a summer solo Renhai I recently wrote.

Renhai Reflections 11: Renhai Summary

Renhai: What & How/a>

Before moving on to further examples, here is a summary of what Renhai is and how it is usually written:

A Minimum Definition of Renhai:

1. Three independent haiku (formatted as 3-lines, 2-lines, 3-lines). 2. Each haiku (verse) links uniquely to the other two verses in some way. 3. Each verse references at least one common theme. 4. A seasonal reference (kigo) is desired. If there is a season then only one season is referenced by at least one verse. If there is no kigo then the renhai should be nature-based and would be considered "Non-seasonal" or "All seasonal". 5. There is an appropriate title. How the verses link, what constitutes an appropriate title, and other details such as format and style are refinements that are left up to the writers.

Seven Basic Steps to Composing a Renhai:

1. Agree on a season in which to write.
2. Write the Middle Verse, First Line (partner 1).
3. Write the Middle Verse, Second Line (partner 2).
4. Choose a Theme.
5. Write the Third Verse (partner 1).
6. Write the First Verse (partner 2).
7. Choose a Title.

Although Renhai was intended as a collaborative verse form, some members of the Renhai Studio spontaneously started writing Renhai on their own, perhaps while waiting for a partner to come free. Tomorrow I'll present a summer solo Renhai I recently wrote.

2008-09-10

Renhai Reflections 10: Fairy Ring

Renhai Example: Fairy Ring

Fairy Ring
A Renhai by Vaughn Seward (vs), and Zhanna P. Rader (zr)
Renhai #2, Nov 16-23, 2007

Totem pole —
a lone eagle circles
high above. /vs

A fairy ring on the lawn — /zr
the gnome, to his chin in leaves. /vs

Easter Island —
tourists walk around moai,
necks craned, mouths open. /zr

Theme 1: Mythical, statue-like object.
Theme 2: Circular.
Season: Autumn
Link 1 to 2: Up in the sky / Low on the ground.
Link 2 to 3: Gathered around (Leaves / Tourists).
Link 3 to 1: a) Aboriginal; b) Living creatures (Eagle / Tourists).

Notes: Moai are monolithic human figures carved from rock on Rapa Nui / Easter Island, mostly between 1250 and 1500 CE.

2008-09-09

Renhai Reflections 9: Introduction #9

Renhai Anatomy: The First Verse

In this Renhai the last verse written was actually the first verse in the Renhai:

Still autumn night —
each patch of the forest,
full of darkness. /vs

Blanket of velvet-gray fog — /zr
a crow pierces the silence. /vs

Coffee aroma
permeates the morning air —
sudden rain... /zr

This creates a balanced alternating pattern of authors: /vs, /zr, /vs, /zr. However, this is not an essential requirement of renhai and sometimes the writers will find that after writing a renhai that it reads better having verses 1 & 3 switched around.

The theme in verse 1 above is supported by the darkness permeating the forest. The link from verse 1 to the middle verse is the concept of stillness/silence, i.e.:
  • First verse: still autumn night.
  • Middle verse: Silence.
And the link between verse 1 and verse 3 is morning/night, i.e.:
  • First verse: autumn night.
  • Middle verse: morning air.
It isn't necessary for a reader to understand the season, theme, and linking aspects of Renhai but these elements pull the three stand-alone haiku into a intuitive, unified whole.

Here is the associated worksheet for this renhai:
http://tinyurl.com/677fv6

One last note about Renhai is that, like Rengay, the verses show a linked series of stand-alone haiku which all reference a common theme. There is no need for them to be narrative, although writers are free to do so.

Next: Another Renhai Example

2008-09-08

Renhai Reflections 8: Introduction #8

Renhai Anatomy: The Third Verse

With a season of autumn and a theme of "Permeating", Zhanna wrote the following third verse:

Blanket of velvet-gray fog — /zr
a crow pierces the silence. /vs

Coffee aroma
permeates the morning air —
sudden rain... /zr

You can see that the theme is supported by the coffee aroma permeating the morning air. The link back to the middle verse is the concept of interruption, i.e.:
  • Middle verse: crow interrupting the silence.
  • Third verse: sudden rain interrupting the morning.
The last verse to be written, the first verse, must now support the theme of "Permeating" as well as somehow link back to both of these verses.

Next: Renhai Anatomy: The First Verse

2008-09-07

Renhai Reflections 7: Introduction #7

Renhai Anatomy: Theme and Linking

Blanket of velvet-gray fog — /zr
a crow pierces the silence. /vs

This middle verse not only portrays an image of nature but it also contains a number of potential themes and things that could be used for linking with other verses. I.e.:
  • Flat, Blanket-like.
  • Covering, Permeating.
  • Velvety, Soft.
  • Gray-coloured.
  • Black-coloured, Dark.
  • Fog, Mist, Rain, Steam, Cloud-like.
  • Stillness, Silence.
  • Crow, Bird, Animal.
  • Cawing, Bird call.
  • Piercing (sound), Interruption.
For the season, we had previously chosen "autumn". But although this middle verse does not have a specific reference to autumn, it can support not only autumn but also summer and spring. In some locations it could even occur in winter. The other verses will therefore have to strengthen the autumn feel in this Renhai.

After some discussion, at this point Zhanna and I decided that we liked the idea of "Permeating" and decided to write the other verses to this theme. The other verses would therefore support this theme and also reference one or more of the above objects, actions, and descriptions in their linkages.

As Zhanna wrote the first line of this middle verse, it was her turn to write the next verse.

Next: Renhai Anatomy: The Third Verse

2008-09-05

Renhai Reflections 6: Introduction #6

Renhai Anatomy: Middle Verse

Let's go back to the Renhai posted in this blog last Sunday and work through its creation step by step. A Renhai is started with the writing of the middle verse. Typically, a season is chosen and one partner writes one line of the two-line middle verse. Most often the season chosen is the one that you are in at the time of writing. In this Renhai it was late August so we chose late summer / early autumn for the season.

To kick things off, Zhanna wrote the following line:

blanket of velvet-gray fog

This describes a setting, leaving open numerous possibilities for the second line. After some consideration I decided to contrast the serene feeling with the following line:

a crow pierces the silence

Together these lines present the following haiku image:

Blanket of velvet-gray fog — /zr
a crow pierces the silence. /vs

As in Rengay, the middle verse in Renhai is a two-line haiku with typically two images or concepts in juxtaposition. The next step after writing the middle verse is the consideration of the theme and then the partner who wrote the first line then writes the next 3-line haiku verse.

Next: Renhai Anatomy: Theme and Linking

2008-09-04

Renhai Reflections 5: Introduction #5

Renhai Origins: Renhai is Born

How did the idea of Renhai come about? Well, it all started one day in August last year (2007), around the time the year-long Rengay project was getting started. I got to thinking, "what if a Rengay-like poem was even shorter than six verses?" Of course, one verse is a Haiku and two verses is a Tanka. What about three verses?

This idea was appealing as it nicely corresponded with the three "lines" of Haiku. Could it be possible to write such a short rengay-like poem? Could this be successfully accomplished by two writers? In the weeks following this epiphany, Zhanna P. Rader and I experimented with the idea and after a couple of tries found a good way to write them.

The final approach intrigued us in that the middle verse was truly collaborative and that the entire poem was so short yet was themed and fully linked. We also found that you could write Renhai quickly, many of them often being completed within a day.

In December, 2007 we created a Renhai Studio Yahoo group for the purpose of incubating our ideas, conducting experiments, and sharing the results:

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/renhai/

Since then, over 60 Renhai have been written by 15 different writers. I hope to share with you in the coming weeks and months some of our experiments and results as well as new Renhai Reflection creations that will be written during this time.

Next: The Anatomy of a Renhai

2008-09-03

Renhai Reflections 4: Introduction #4

Renhai Origins: Renku & Rengay

Basho (1644-1694) and his disciples settled upon writing renga-like poems with 36 stanzas. Each verse had to link back to the previous verse in some way. For example, if a verse took place near a lake, the next verse might be about a boat on the sea.

Since the first verse, which was called the hokku, did not have a verse to link back to, it needed to have an internal device to start off the poem and set things in motion. The way this was accomplished was that two word-pictures were placed in juxtaposition within the same verse. Typically, one part of the verse was noun-like and often provided a context for the other part which was usually a verbal phrase. The other verses in a Renku were usually complete sentences describing some image or event.

Writing the first verse was considered a great honour and so poets in time started collecting personal hokku that they could use if called upon in a writing session. Renku in those days were typically written at renku-writing "parties" (now they are most often written over the Internet). Eventually writing and collecting hokku as stand-alone poems for their own merit became popular. Somewhere along the way they came to be called Haiku.

In 1992 when Gary Gay came up with idea of Rengay, he wanted a simpler, shorter Renku. Six verses seemed long enough to be interesting and for developing a theme but not too long that readers would grow tired. He also wanted simpler rules that provided the writers more freedom. Rengay became very popular up until the present day and they appear regularly in various poetry magazines.

As you may know, last year we went through the seasons with a Rengay posted each week:

http://haikuworkshop.pbwiki.com/RengayThroughTheSeasons

Next: Renhai Origins: Renhai is Born

2008-09-02

Renhai Reflections 3: Introduction #3

Renhai Origins: Haiku & Renga

Before we jump further into the anatomy of a Renhai poem let's review briefly how Renhai came into being. Since Renhai consists of Haiku verses and because Renhai shares characteristics of Rengay, it might be a idea good to briefly review these other poetic forms.

Most of you, I'm sure, are familiar with Haiku. It is the Japanese verse form consisting of 17 Japanese-language syllables, in a 5-7-5 pattern, most often incorporating nature themes and with a seasonal reference. In English Haiku the "rules" are roughly the same but there are a number of minor variations.

The origins of Haiku actually go back to a form called Renku and before that Renga. Renga was a dignified academic poetry form that started in Japan in the 1300's. Several poets would cooperatively create a poem of typically 100 verses, each verse being added by a different poet in rotation. The first verse had a 5-7-5 format the second 7-7, the third 5-7-5 and so on. There were many other rules following medieval aesthetics and the writers tended to reference and/or allude to Japanese classical literature.

By the 1400's Rengay was the dominant form of poetry in Japan and it became a popular pastime among common people by the 1600's. Around this time a famous Japanese poet named Basho came on the scene. He perfected the modern form of Renga which we now call Renku. Tomorrow we'll take a closer look at Renku and explore how it led to Rengay in 1992 and then to Renhai in 2007.

Next: Renhai Origins: Renku & Rengay

2008-09-01

Renhai Reflections 2: Introduction #2

Renhai's Uniqueness

A Renhai consists of three haiku verses that are typically a collaboration of two writers. The final result is similar to the first three verses of a Rengay with each of the three verses having one or more common themes. Renku-like links exist between each verse including between the first and the last. In later posts this week we will explore the anatomy of Renhai. For those who can't wait and want a sneak preview of what is ahead, have a look at the worksheet for yesterday's Renhai, "A Night Out".

What is unique about Renhai is that the middle two-line verse is jointly written. That is, the first line is written by one writer and second line is written by the the other writer. In the example posted yesterday, the middle verse appeared as:

Blanket of velvet-gray fog — /zr
a crow pierces the silence. /vs

As you can see, the first line was written by Zhanna and the second line by Vaughn. In fact, the middle verse was actually written first and the first and third verses were written afterward. A proper Renhai is therefore written in this inside-out manner.

What this means is that a Renhai is organically derived. The middle verse is like a seed that germinates and sprouts a root (3rd verse) and a stem (1st verse)

Next: The origins of how the new Renhai poetic form came to be.