Miles Around A Renhai by Vaughn Seward (vs), and Hortensia Anderson (ha) Written Nov 29 - Dec 6, 2007
Dawn's cloud cover — the pale grey sky deepens with the dusk. /ha
Untouched snow for miles around — /ha faint tree line in the distance. /vs
Empty nest — a weathered bit of string hangs from a twig. /vs
Theme: Untouched Season: Winter Link 1 to 2: Sky / Horizon Link 2 to 3: Tree / Twig Link 3 to 1: Weathered / Pale
The untouched theme is referenced in verse 1 by the feeling of the sky being normally out of reach. "We had been fishing in the winter (the whole day - but in a boat) and at dawn, the sky was nothing but cloud cover. On our way back, as the sky darkened, I noticed we never had seen a sun. That 'dawn's pale cloud cover' was still there and grey, only deepening with dusk. It was like a rippling sky - like washable silk."
In verse 3 "untouched" is portrayed by the empty nest of the birds that had flown south for the winter.
This is another early Renhai written with Hortensia Anderson of New York city. It is the first of a three-way set of Renhai with Hortensia, myself, and Zhanna P. Rader (of Georgia). We'll look more into what a three-way is all about after posting the other two Renhai.
From "The Haiku Anthology" I became interested in Haiku and I have since written numerous haiku, senyru, and tanka. "Masago", my haiku pen-name, means "grain(s) of sand" in Japanese. I have recently started learning Esperanto and Japanese. A few years ago I developed a new eastern verse form which we now call 'Renhai'.