2008-11-08

Renhai Reflections 39: Quiet Rhythms


Quiet Rhythms

A Renhai by Gillena Cox (gc) & Vaughn Seward (vs)
Written Oct 29 - Nov 4, 2008

The rippling river — a blue morpho butterfly / glides across. /gc
Silk cotton leaves undulate —
/gc a spider spins out below. /vs
From the footbridge / the boy pulls out a penny... the sound of ploop!
/vs

11 comments:

Devika said...

Very Nice set Masago:-)

some how liked th fun in the last..
but my favourite is the first :-)

wishes!
devika

Devika said...

i will be making my rounds for the notes again Masago...:-)

to me the last one seemed an odd man out!

wishes!
devika

John McDonald said...

very good vaughn
john

Irene said...

How can anyone not love the sound of PLOOP!?! ;p

polona said...

great imagery again,and the last verse made me smile :)

Bill said...

No hurry, and then ploop.

kouji said...

beautiful. :)

Janice Thomson said...

I like the slow gentle movements in all these verses - well done.

Masago said...

Thank you all on behalf of Gillena and me!

Devika: it is true that some individual verses are often more meaningful for a reader; the goal of Renhai, of course, is to generate an emotion, a feeling when the Renhai is read as a whole, each verse contributing a bit and the linking and theme references working together in concert, subliminally, if not conspicuously. :-) Thank you!

[I have been posting just the verses on night and the notes the next night. I am planning on changing this shortly where you be able to get a sneak peak at the notes on the first night a Renhai is posted. :-)]

Irene: I'm with ya!

Again, thank you all!

jem said...

Great sense of above and below - my eyes were trying to dart about as I read to take in the scenes you painted.

Masago said...

Jem: Thank you. You are indeed a skilled reader!