2009-04-01

Renhai Reflections 93: The Day I left the Cloud


The Day I Left the Cloud

A Renhai by Vaughn Seward (vs) & Zhanna P. Rader (zh.r)

Rolling, tumbling...
I land on a plane's windshield —
the pilots don't smile. /vs

Free fall, the wind pushes me — /vs
I merge with a look-alike. /zh.r

Splash-bouncing
into the ocean's surface,
I lose track of myself... /zh.r

Click here for notes and linking details:
http://cflat7.drivehq.com/Renhai_0133.htm

10 comments:

Devika said...

Sounds funny, but yet it isn't,

the metaphors are atypical, yet its a life situation set out in three short verse..

liked them Masago and Zhanna

wishes,
devika

Borut said...

I won't go into it, but,lovely, and..., very deep!:)

John McDonald said...

exciting
john

Gillena Cox said...

A witty one;
i would have link noted
V1 to V2 Landing/free fall


much love
gillena

J. Andrew Lockhart said...

"I left the Cloud"- that alone is worth the visit. I love that! :)

Janice Thomson said...

I agree with Andrew - the title alone is fabulous.
Love how this starts with annoyance and leads to harmony, perfection and oneness in the end.

RBroeker said...

The cloud is the ocean is the cloud. Lines which make me feel safe and secure. Thanks for that.

Best wishes
Ralf

Masago said...

Thank you all!

jem said...

Long gap from blog reading, the intrusions of everyday life. Good to be catching up, normal reading / commenting will resume from now.

I like this one, and it reminded me of a series called 'The Peculiar Thoughts of Raindrops' that I wrote a long time ago - two of the better bits -

a gentle landing
the world wavers as the grass stem
struggles to right itself


my landing is hairy -
the dog shakes,
my flight continues

Masago said...

Jem: Thanks for your comments, I love your verses!