2008-10-10
Renhai Reflections 22: Full Middle Verse Linking
The First Time
A Renhai by Betty Kaplan (bk), and Vaughn Seward (vs)
Written Apr 21-22, 2008
First time milking —
he squeezes hard but
nothing comes. /vs
Home from the strawberry farm — /bk
each finger stained winy red. /vs
Bake class 101 —
small noses coated in flour,
dough ready for tarts. /bk
Theme: Food Collection/Preparation
Season: Spring/Summer
Link 1 to 2a: Farm
Link 1 to 2b: Fingers
Link 3 to 2a: Tart/Strawberry
Link 3 to 2b: Body part covered/stained
Link 3 to 1: Learner(s)
This Renhai was written with Betty Kaplan of Florida. It is unique in that it was suggested by Betty that the three-line verses link to each of the 2 middle lines. It was therefore the first time that this was done with a Renhai.
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10 comments:
Just catching up, Vaughn. I'm enjoying the renhai.
I think Renhai begins to teach me regression analysis all over again..
I should say that was tough study earlier..but poetry makes it easier here i suppose...:-)
the last one i liked..it happens with me often..even now :-)
see again!
devika
The first time... In a class of its own then!?:)
nice one
john
enjoyed reading haikus here
i added your link to my blog
thanks
Bill: Thank you for following along.
Devika: Thank you. Renhai isn't meant to tax you too much. :-)
Borut: *smile* Thanks.
John: Thank you.
Blog author: Thank you for dropping by and for the link on your blog.
a lot of room for experimenting in this form, i see :-)
this one is cute
Very sensory and atmospheric and fun too. I've never tried milking but I can see myself in the other two scenes.
brought back some childhood memories.
Pamela: Me too. :-)
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