2007-09-05

Rengay Through the Seasons #1 [1-4]

by Masago: Rengay 1, Verses 1-4 (of 6)

A green sprig / pokes above the edge — eaves trough.
Leaves in the back yard, a frisbee almost buried.
Rear car window — "Wash Me" handwritten / in stuck-on dust.
Dirty dishes / spread on the kitchen table... vase of daisies.

8 comments:

J. Andrew Lockhart said...

the last part sounds so much like my kitchen! :)

Pamela said...

I'm trying to understand the rhythm.
.... all new to me. But I'm sticking in .

John McDonald said...

nice build up
john

floots said...

a bit like andrew's comment
i'm enjoying this for it's gently random domesticity
(and learning the form)
cheers

Borut said...

Time for autumn-cleaning...!?:)

Anonymous said...

Nice progress.

Vaughn, this has got to be one of the best blog projects out there.

Pat Paulk said...

I relate to being unkempt. It's a way of life. Man you do like challenges.

Masago said...

Andrew: Sometimes mine too. :-)

Pamela: Please hang in there... remember this is a set of haiku. With haiku there is no rhyming sort of rhythm. But I do try have each haiku have a 2-3-2 rhythm in the 3-line verses and and a 3-3 rhythm in the 2-liners.

John: Thanks.

Floots: Yes, rengay are not necessarily narrative. The most important thing is the theme that develops and that each verse links to its successor (and the last verse most often links to the first verse).

Borut: Now that sounds like a likely theme.

Aurora: Your kind words are greatly appreciated.

Pat: :-)